My friends Sara of the fantastic Browns and Misty of the Boston craft cocktail industry came to Chicago and we hung out on the roof. Brandy my co-manager went out of town for a wedding and asked me to take care of her 2 cats and 6 fish. We spoke at length on the phone and I took detailed notes: “2 cats:
Benny Garcia she’s about the same as porcupine. I asked if she meant a threatened or non-threatened porcupine and Brandy said she doesn’t know what a porcupine looks like. The cat is 6 years old. She is named after a Mexican gentleman that worked on Jamie’s father electric plant in Houston, Texas. She will be hiding under the bed.
The other one is Sidney. 17 years old. “A little bit sick, lately.” If anything happens call immediately. She is the one that is gonna be out and want your attention. She likes to be pet. She’s a tortoise shell. A torty, a tortoise shell, is like a phrase. It what you call certain types of cat. Brown, black and spotty.
No people food.
Dry food. They like ice water.
Sidney really, really, really likes the ice water in the cup.
When you come into the house, there’s gonna be an air mattress set up. You’re going to see an air mattress with the couch. If you look to the right and go all the way back to the kitchen, there’s a basket by the door that has all of their food in it. Their food bowls are under the bar area: there’s this crazy bar area in our apartment and we don’t use it.
Crumple a piece of paper and throw it on the floor: Sidney likes that.
Apartment is on the 2nd floor. There’s some cat grass and a plastic cup. Keep this cup full of ice water.
Fish food is right inside the fish tank: between a pinch and a shake.
12 year old fish. Some of them are 18 years old. Don’t fuck this up.
Just take the canister and pour a little bit in and you’ll be fine.
With the cats just give them food and water. That’s the only thing you have to do.”