Lately I noticed that my ability to hear people talk & my own words outloud had greatly diminished. I realized it was because there was an extra four pounds of mucus trapped in my nasal passages & I panicked and started shouting, “Burgalar! Burgalar!” Once the panic wore off I went out and bought some lotiony tissues (generic brand but the box is purple & yellow so don’t think Im cheap… Im representin’). I downed fizzy Airborne in water.
Another clue? The mucus must have set out for my throat eyes & nasal passages some time in the night, because when I woke up I found a horrendous problem with my bedding. By all appearances someone had blown their nose right into my comforter. The mucus stain on the comforter caused my stomach to churn uncomfortably. I hustled out of bed and ran everything I have through the laundry twice. Between this and the 24/36 hour stomach flu I had a couple weeks ago, my material possessions are getting hammered & pelted with bad bodily fluids.
But how am I feeling now? My motor activities are slow and my mental revving is turning over more slowly, but I am breathing through my nose. When problems pop up I have lotiony tissues, Airborne, and if I get panicky I will stick my head out the window into the drizzling snow/rain and holler “Burgalar!” to the neighborhood. I don’t doubt that I invited in the mucus mudslide myself.
Maybe it was last week when I tore apart my room to be ready for my new futon. There was so much dust disturbed that I had to vocally verbally caution my roommates to stay away and not to enter my room or remove any items from it. The dust exposure could be to blame, and that would be my fault for not wearing one of the white surgical bird flu masks that I have been stockpiling by the thousandpack in case of pandemic. It was just negligence that I didn’t wear one, I can’t blame fashion. Those surgical masks have hit the runways of Singapore to Japan, been donned by the King of Pop as well…
The culprit in the mucus capture the flag victory over my throat & lungs & those treacherously vulnerable nasal passages may also have been the drinking of three margaritas on Tuesday night. Big 3rdarm (uhh… yeah I’m talking in 3rd person) went out to three bars as part of a birthday entourage (aka undercover street attorney terror-security squad) for my bosswoman general managers birthday party train. Because I hardly ever drink, those crucial sips of alchohol may have killed all the “good germs” that have been protecting my passages like barnacles and allowed new, more viciously evolved “bad cold germs” to grow in their place.
Seriously though, I’m no doctor or even amateur medical specialist, and the cause of this could very well vary from my suspicions. For all I know, the root of my mucus production could be something way off-the-radar, like smoking unfiltered Pall Malls outside in the winter air, not drinking enough water, not getting enough sleep regularly, or perhaps I was bitten by a sick bird one day when the sun was shining and I was unawares.
if a bird bit you then you aren’t allowed near the continental birds and the shack may need to get rented again and you may indeed have to stay inside it for 10 days. because if you started mingling with birds again ….